The gift of peace...

Yesterday God showed me He will turn all things around for the good. I have had much regret and pain over leaving God for a season of my life. It is never worth it to backslide. NEVER!!! Im not proud of who I was or what I did when I left, but God showed me everything is not in vain.
One of my close friends came to church yesterday. Let me tell you the story although I never thought I would talk about some of these things I feel like it will bring God glory sharing part of my shame.
I met Michael when I was backslid. The very night I met him God began to speak to me about him. God would do this to me all the time. It didnt matter if I was high or whatever God would speak to me about people like He does now in church. I remember saying to God I am not going to tell this guy anything. He is dealing drugs and we are here to get high and I am in no frame of mind to talk to him about God. Well I didnt tell him and God didnt let me sleep that night. I wrestled with the voice of God all night. I finally got so upset and asked God to leave me alone. I told God why dont you use someone who is sitting on the front pew of the church begging to be used. I am not worth your time. Why do you talk to me about people when Im drinking and have no right to tell them about you?? I was so frustrated. God spoke to me so clearly that night and I will never forget it, He said, Noel your gift can operate under the anointing or your gift will torment you. Its up you but the gift I have placed on your life will not leave you. Of course at the time I cried and just shook my head and thought why me Lord? What do you see in me?? I felt so unworthy of this and upset I couldnt make it go away.

I saw him a couple more times out and about and I finally told him I have to talk to you. He said ok and sat down with me. I told him God told me to tell him he was running from a call on his life. I told him God said he loved him and a bunch of other stuff. The whole time he was quiet and I said I know I am no one to tell you this and you probably think Im crazy but if I dont tell you God wont leave me alone.

I was shocked by his response. He said if God tells you to tell me something I hope you would tell me. It may be the last time you see me. You dont know what I do out there. He told me this is not what I really want to do but I can make more $ in a week than in a month with a regular job and I have a family to take care of. He said dont be embarrassed to tell me anything about God I believe you. He said there is never a wrong time to talk about God.

I knew there was something different about him. We became very good friends and I eventually went back to church. We would always talk about God and sometimes I would cook him something to eat and try to tell him to stop and come to church. He always told me he loved his wife and his kids so much and he wanted to stop. I told him how much God had changed my life and he eventually got caught and went to jail. During those two different periods he was locked up I wrote to him and we talked about God and I learned him and his wife were youth ministers at an assemblies of God church. I learned his wife had the Holy Ghost and he really was running from God. Now I knew why God made me talk to him. My friend really should of done hard prison time this time around but somehow God allowed him to come home. I believe God has answered his wifes prayers She has never given up on him. Neither have I . I knew one day he would come back to God. He promised me a while back when he got out he would go to my church because he sees the difference in me and yesterday he was true to his word. In all the seven years Ive known him he has always been kind to my family and told me I was like a sister to him. He said he would always be there for me and no one better ever hurt me. For the first time in seven years I saw this man cry at our alter. He used to tell me Noel every time I walk out the door I am constantly looking over my shoulder. I have no peace. I cant trust anyone. I cant depend on anyone. I have to carry a gun because Im not going to get killed out here. He said I pray every day for Gods mercy to stay with me and I pray one day Lord let me make it into the gates of heaven before its to late I was so touched by this and I always prayed that for him.
I know he isnt someone you would ever think would change but God can change anyone. I have seen him do it. I thought about a lot of other people I met out there and how God talked to me about them and God always ruined my little party by showing up and it would always end up me telling this person what God was saying and them crying and me crying and them saying how did you know?? I would say I dont but God does. I cant tell you how many times this happened to me when I was away from God. Every place I went God showed up weather I liked it or not. It was all part of Gods plan. This week I am going to contact some of those other people and invite them to church and what the devil meant for bad I am going to allow God to make it for the good. All these people I met was not an accident. They all were seeking God. Everyone of them. So that season in my life that I wish I could forget I will take advantage now and bring those souls to God. Let me say I would never do it the same if I could change it, but if God can get some glory by my mistakes then so be it. I thank God Michael and his wife came. They both said they felt a powerful touch of God and they would be back. Christina is a youth minister again at her church, but I plan on visiting with them a lot and maybe converting their whole church to oneness. God can. He is able. This couple was destined to serve God just like me. The scripture rings true today, "All things work together for the good of those who love the Lord." All things....My pastor preached a message yesterday about the Gift of peace. I was telling my husband honey I cant even explain how I feel about that message I said it was so beautifully articulated and spoken and I searched for words as my husband responded it was profound and fundamentally sound. I said yes.. That describes it well. That was one of the greatest messages I have had the privilege of hearing. This gift of peace is priceless and what this world is looking for. I remember seeing Michael with huge wads of cash and all the materiel things you could imagine. When he would come and eat he would look so exhausted and unhappy. He would say I have everything but peace of mind. God is the only way you can have peace. There is no music, no candle, no massage therapy, no drug, no person, no food no amount of money or any other thing that can be a source of true peace except for Jesus Christ. Come one come all for your cup of the perfect gift of peace.